It is difficult to describe the feeling a veterinarian has when they’re positioned between the hind legs of a two hundred kilogram bull calf, tasked with a castration and armed with only a steel scalpel blade. Damn vulnerable is a good place to start. Was the sweat that beaded my forehead and stung my eyes from the apprehension or from the relentless Australian sun? I had already performed the sedation and local freezing. Now the first testicle was exposed and ready to be removed.

The calf was supposedly restrained in the crush… or so I thought. Before the circuitry in my brain could form any real-time connections, I was nose-to-nose with the soon-to-be steer. I grabbed both sides of the crush and climbed monkey-like up the side gates. When I describe just how close I was to having a near-death incident, the half a centimeter between my thumb and forefinger represent the approximated distance between my low-hanging bum and the back of the bull as it charged underneath me.

Let us rewind a bit. Before beginning the procedure, I had left the back sliding gate of the crush open for my safety. Because there wasn’t a vet gate, the side of the crush did not have a release and the head gate was known to be dodgy. And this was a brand new crush, but the type you would order at a 50% discount from Temu or Wish. Now, standing perched above the crush, I watched my bovine patient scamper down the paddock with one testicle swinging beneath him like a fleshy pink Yo-Yo.

I climbed down, fuming. I practically threw my bloody scalpel blade at my bewildered student assistant and stomped down the paddock to capture the escapee.

After some gentle persuasion, I convinced my patient to return into the crush. Then my colleagues, the stock handler, and I proceeded to swiftly finish the job. We extracted the second testicle soon after. If there exists an entry for “fastest calf castration” in the Guinness World Records, you can bet your boots we overtook it with our second bull calf.

Alright, kids, now if some kind of moral or lesson can be gleamed out of this harrowing experience, it is that every farm should possess a livestock crush—ideally one that wasn’t purchase from The Reject Shop and doubles as a euthanasia contraption for your local veterinarian.

Oh, but the benefits go far beyond your vet living past the age of 28!

Here are a few:

• Improved animal health. By using proper equipment, you can minimize bruising, injection site damage, and stress. Negative effects from stress cause lower conception rates, reduce vaccination effectiveness, and reduce immune and rumen functions
• Cattle feel safe and less pressured when restrained properly
• Handlers feel safer, and avoid injuring themselves
• Increases economic viability of your farm

What does a good quality crush have?

• Appropriate footing to prevent slipping
• A reliable head gate: guards to prevent break outs, varying head capacity (from calf to bull), and self-catching abilities
• Good accessibility to the animal—upper and lower side gates with a release feature
• Backdrop gate
• Palpation cage

Ask your veterinarian for some suggestions before purchasing new or used handling systems for your farm.

Written by: Dr. Monica Kunze

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